Liberating lingerie

By Cynthia Pegram

Published: May 31, 2008

This fashion show was on the saucy side, full of impertinence and humor — no tense angular models wearing impossible-to-wear clothes.

Instead, plump, thin or frankly round, some of these models deftly caricatured the professionals on the runways.

The recent light-hearted evening at The Kirkley in Lynchburg was to benefit Bosom Buddies. The buddies are cancer patients who need, but can’t afford, the under extras. Women with mastectomies are among the regular clientele of Susan Kadas, owner of Absolute Perfection Bra-tique in Appomattox, who put on the show.

Underwear and outerwear on display ranged from gasp-red scanties to Big Mama generous. And more than one feather boa left as a boisterous souvenir floating in the air. The fancy pants were handheld for the audience to see, not worn by the models. The occasional bra on view was modeled over a long-sleeved turtleneck top.

Kadas’ cheerful emcee patter moved the audience through any amateur glitches that could have marred the glimpse into the stages — and attitudes — of a woman’s life. Like Jennifer Neighbors as a bride in a white peignoir. Her shoulder-length blonde hair was as shiny and mobile as satin. Later, her outfit was less demure, and her hair was short.

Soon the all-woman audience saw her another way, her long neck and shapely head bare of any tresses. Neighbors, a mother of two children under 10 and the youngest model, is in chemotherapy for breast cancer.The otherwise svelte Joyce Leslie played the frump in one outfit. Her gift for mime captured the droll with a gesture or a look, often evoking rollicking laughter from the audience.

She was among the models, who are cancer survivors.

Beneath the humor was the message that femininity is a survivor, too.And that there are people out there who can help on the down moments faced by women with cancer of any kind.

“Just because you’ve had a mastectomy doesn’t mean you can’t wear bathing suits or pretty bras,” said Kadas.

The 62-year-old has had her own experience with cancer, including the removal of a lump in her breast when she was 19.

She needed a bra that would balance out that loss, and “at 19 I was thinking bodily image.”

The youthful Kadas got a lot of quick advice — “Oh well, try this” — when nothing seemed to work.

There had to be a better way, she remembers thinking, and found it when she was invited to a “bra party” — a direct selling method kind of like Tupperware Parties.

She found what she needed, and “I eventually went to work for that company.” Later, when she became a divorced mom with two children, she began working with women who also had breasts removed.
Those were the days of the Halsted radical mastectomy — rare today — that removed the whole breast, the underlying muscle and the lymph nodes of the arm. The procedure could be disfiguring.

Working with them, “I would go home and just cry,” said Kadas. Some ladies were left with a deep depression to bones in the chest, burns from radiation and damage from infection.

“It was a horrendous thing,” she said. She promised herself, “I will not turn away. They were going to feel whole, as far as I was concerned.”

She also found that laughter and getting together with others was helpful. “We were concentrating on their whole spirit.”

Today’s patients are much different. Cancers are found much earlier and are treated quickly so patients’ problems are seldom as severe.

Fitting a bra means selecting a type appropriate to the new shape of the breast, or selecting a breast prosthesis of the best weight and shape. Breasts have weight without it, one shoulder would rise above the other, and that can lead to back problems.

Women also have abdominal scars from surgery for other kinds of cancer. Some have lost much weight. Figure control undergarments with seams on the outside can give some relief.

But today’s biggest challenge for Kadas is dealing with person’s emotional well-being.

“Some are so sad and distraught. They never expected it to happen, and they don’t understand what their body is going through. We try to get their spirits lifted.

“Healing has a lot to do with mental attitude.”

Joyce Leslie, the slender gray-haired modelwho played the frump, also wore a definitely un-frumpy camisole. She said she wasn’t self-conscious. She flashed a nifty lace garter on stage, too.

Once you step out there, “the crazier you are, the better,” she said. “It’s not fun if it’s not silly.”

The serious part is getting a diagnosis of cancer. “When they said I had cancer, I couldn’t even speak. I was just ready to fall apart.”

After surgery, Leslie took things step by step. She told herself, “If I make it 10 years, I’m good to go.”

Now, at 14 years post-op “I still have my mammograms and my cancer check.”

Jennifer Neighbors, like Leslie, is not reticent about being a cancer survivor.

That’s because of her admiration for a co-worker, who was very open about her own cancer “and shared so much information with me, and made it so much easier to go through all this.”

People don’t need to hide the diagnosis or the mastectomy, she said. “ I feel sad they feel that, and not that they should be proud of themselves.”

Her first wig was long and blonde, and came through the American Cancer Society, where she was also able to get mastectomy bras and forms. She also has a mid-length brown shaggy wig.

“The American Cancer Society is a great resource.”

This was Neighbors’ first time on stage as a model. She was dubious after Kadas asked her and discussed it with several friends at a ladies-night-out dinner.

“‘I’ll do it if you’ll do it,’” said one.

“‘Do they need any plus-size models?’” asked the other.

Shortly thereafter, all were in the show.

“I was really nervous,” said Neighbors. Two things got her past the nerves: the Bosom Buddy cause and doing it “so women could see it’s not the end of the world.”

The show turned out to be another way women support each other.

“I laughed really hard at a lot of the ladies,” she said. “They were hilarious and really inspired me to have fun with them.”

Susan Kadas can be reached at (434) 352-0233.