Imagining the perfect school night

By Ken West
Published: August 18, 2008

Parents who were good athletes readily know how to help their children develop their athletic potential.

“Practice every day. Take practice seriously. Don’t let outside distractions interfere with your preparation. Eat well. Sleep well. Be ready for the game. I’ll be there to cheer you on.”

Parents who were good students know how to develop good academic potential: “Do homework every day. Take homework seriously. Don’t let outside distractions interfere with your preparation. Eat well. Sleep well. Be ready for tests. I’ll be there to cheer you on.”

Of course, young children need structure and supervision to develop their talents. Creating good habits in elementary school is far easier than redirecting children later on. Let’s imagine a perfect school night. You will not be able to create ideal school nights every evening. Yet the more consistently you maintain a positive schedule the easier it will be for your children to develop their academic talents.

Dinner
Psychologists urge families to eat together at least four times each week. Research shows that the children of families who eat together fewer times tend to experience more academic and discipline problems. Turn the television off. Dinner needs to be a time for discussion. “What did you learn in school today?” “What fun things did you do?” “Who are your best friends? What are they like?” Show your interest in your children’s school work and personal lives. Be a family that loves to talk about learning and life.

A quiet time
Parents need to create a Quiet Time after dinner. This is generally a one=hour period when all screens are turned off that are not being used to do work or homework. If children do not have homework, urge them to read or paint or draw. Provide art supplies, books, puzzles and other resources that will help them to stay mentally active.

Parents can use this hour to read whatever they enjoy or to pay bills. When children see their parents reading and using math, they realize that what they are learning in school is important in daily life. If something on television is crucial to see, tape it. For one hour adults need to practice what they preach: Reading and math are crucial life skills.

Screen time
There is good news in America. Recent research shows that parents are reducing the amount of screen time their children use. The average school child now watches three hours of television each day.

However, the American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that students should be in front of screens no more than two hours per day. This screen time includes television, movies, video games and computer games.

Supervise what your children watch. Have them tape shows that are positive. Watch programs with them and discuss what you see. Always offer options to watching television that might include playing games, practicing an instrument, learning a hobby, reading or spending time with family members.

Should children have a television in their bedrooms? I will rely on the wisdom of Mark Twain: “When it comes to trouble, it is easier to stay out than to get out.” Putting televisions in bedrooms makes as much sense as putting the proverbial fox in charge of the henhouse. Nothing good will come of it.

Bedtime
You will be amazed at how many years you can read to your child at bedtime. Most will enjoy reading with you until their friends tease them about it. For many, that will be years down the road. When your children are old enough to tell time, they can set their own alarms and wake themselves up. The usual rule is: “If you get yourself up in the morning, you will be in charge of your bedtime that night. If I have to get you up or rush you to school, I will be in charge that night.”

Exceptions to plans always occur. Our lives are not simple. However, to develop academic skills, children need your help in creating positive habits. Stick to healthy routines just as athletes stick to theirs. Structure in your home is crucial to success of any kind.